


Anthem of the Angels

by aroseforme



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Death, Destiel - Freeform, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Sad, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-09
Updated: 2014-09-09
Packaged: 2018-02-16 15:51:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2275611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aroseforme/pseuds/aroseforme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I'm bad at endings. I hope you like it cause it took me forever. I was inspired by the song Anthem of the Angels by Breaking Benjamin</p>
    </blockquote>





	Anthem of the Angels

**Author's Note:**

> I'm bad at endings. I hope you like it cause it took me forever. I was inspired by the song Anthem of the Angels by Breaking Benjamin

The body laying infront of Dean was one he didnt reconize, not really anyway. Behind their closed lids were crystal blue eyes that were once filled with life. Thin lips that used to smile at him, those same lips he kissed so many times before, so soft and warm. but now they were cold, and chapped, forever held in a frown. His dark hair stood out against his naturally pale complextion. Dean ran a hand through it one last time, remembering. 

_Dean had just taken the trash out after his father scolded him twice for not doing so earlier. He tunred to go back inside when he saw a figure walking down the road, familiar black hair._

_"Cas! Wait!" he had to jog to keep up with him._

_"Dean, now is not the time," he said looking away. A dark bruise was forming under his eye. "leave me alone," he said sadly._

_"Did your father do this to you?" Dean asked softly._

_Cas stopped, how did he know? He thought he hid it pretty well. His dad never hit him in a place you could usually see, but Cas had done something stupid and stuck up for himself. Earning a punch to the face and several to his stomach. Cas's father was a bisness man, always had to be in control. When he learned Cas was gay he went bulistic, telling him no son of his was going to be a faggot. That was the first time he beat Cas. He's going to beat the gay out of him, his father promised._

_He jumped when he felt a rough hand touch the tender area. Dean was inches away from his face then, Cas could feel his breathe agains his lips. He panicked and flinched away. Dean let his hard drop, he could see the fear in Castiels' eyes._

_"I'm sorry," Dean whispered. He knew Cas's father was hitting him, he just never had any proof to confirm it. He took Castiel's hand, relief flooding through him when he didn't pull away. "why don't you come in, it's cold out here," Cas nodded, letting Dean lead him inside._

_"Dad?" John Wincheter looked at his son, then to the boy standing beside him. "Is it alright if Cas spends the night?"_

_"Did you take out the trash?" he says, and Dean nods. "Okay. Tell Sammy to help me with dinner."_

_Dean leads him up the stairs, pausing at the first door. "Sammy!"_

_"Dean how many time do I have to tell you not to call me that?" Sam says opening the door. Castiel was a bit taken back by how tall he was. He himself was about 6 foot._

_Dean smirks, reaching up to ruffle his brothers hair. Sam rolls his eyes. "Dad wants you to help him with dinner."_

_Sam huffs but trots down stairs anyway. Dean opens the door across the hall, beckoning Cas to follow. Once in Dean sits him on the bed inspecting his eye closer._

_"Well, your eye shouldn't get too swollen, can't say the same about you cheek though," he says running his thumb over the mark softly. He sits beside Cas, his hand guiding Cas to look at him._

_Cas is crying now, why was Dean being so nice to him, he was nothing, a burden, he wasn't worth the air he breathed. His father made a point to tell him that everyday. Dean wiped the tears away. "Its okay, you're safe now,"_

_Dean pulls him into a hug, letting Castiel cry into his shirt. After he calmed down Dean pulled away a little, pushing Cas's hair off his forehead. Using his hand he pulled Castiel's face closer, conneting their lips in a soft barely there kiss._

That was the first time Dean felt those lips. Sam was at his side now, hand on his shoulder. He didn't say anything as he pulled Dean into his chest. That was the first time Dean let himself cry. 

_"Sam?" Dean said knocking lightly. He didn't wait for an answer though, opening the door anyway._

_"What's up Dean?" Sam glanced up at his brother._

_"I, uh, I wanted to talk to you about something," he says sitting in the desk chair. Sam waited for him to go on. "It's about Cas, me and him," Dean took a deep breath, "me and him are together."_

_"I kind of guessed that, the way you look at him says a lot." Dean was suprised, but not really. Sammy knew him better then anyone, even himself sometimes. "I dont hate you Dean, being gay doesn't make you a different person." Dean let out the breath he was holding, one down, one to go._

_"Do you think dad will feel the same?" Sam nodded._

_"Dad loves you, no matter who you are," Dean sighs, rubbing his face with his hands._

He was 18 then. Sam has always been there for him, with out him Dean would be lost. It turns out his dad was very understanding that night. Told Dean he will always love him no matter what. Sam led Dean to the front row of seats. It was almost time for the ceremony to start. John sat down next to him and pulled him into his side. The hurt felt unbearable, like Dean's chest was going to explode. 

"I would like to start by saying, I'm very sorry for your loss," The Pastor said. 

"A face we love is missing, A voice we know is still, A place is vacant in our hearts, that only you could fill," His voice grew distant as Dean slipped away into his mind. 

_"Dean!" Cas squeeled, as Dean picked him up and spun around. They were at the park across the street from the school. School had just gotten out and Dean just couldn't wait to wrap his arms around him. Smiling as he set Cas down. "Why are you so happy?" Cas laughed, and god did Dean love that laugh. His smile was enough to light up Dean's whole world. It was such a rare occasion, to see Cas smile like that._

_"I just had a good day," Dean said. He captured Cas's lips in a kiss. He tried to deepen it but Cas pulled away._

_"Dean! We're in public!" Cas said looking around. Dean wondered what he was so worried about, everyone at school already knew. Sure some didn't like it but no one really gave them trouble._

_"Okay, okay," Dean said letting go of him. "So are you coming over for dinner like we planed?" Cas nodded. Dean could see he was nervous about properly meeting his dad. "Come on, lets get some ice cream," Deans smile was contagous._

_x_

_Dinner with Deans family was anything but normal. Though he had warned his father and brother to be on their best behavior but what can you do? His father was sat at the end of the table, Sam on the left, Dean and Castiel on the right._

_"So Castiel," john started._

_"Just Cas," Cas said quietly._

_"Cas," john corrected, "Tell me something about yourself?" Dean squeezed is knee reasuringly._

_"Well, I like to read," He said quietly._

_"You and Sam would get along great then, Sam has always got his nose in a book." John smiled._

_Dinner went suprisingly well._

_x_

_After dinner Cas offered to help Dean with the dishes. Dean washed and Cas dried and put them away. Once in his bedroom Dean pulled Cas into him, breathing in his sent._

_"Cas," He whispers, "I need to tell you something," But instead of letting him finnish Cas brings their lips together in a deep kiss, licking at Dean's bottom lip. Dean parts his lips letting their tongues dance around, he lets Cas take control. Cas backs them up to the bed, pushing Dean back as he moves forward. Cas pulls away sucking in Dean's bottom lip._

_He rakes his hands under Dean's shirt, Dean is suprised to say the least. Cas was never one for touching, not to this extent. But he didn't protest when Cas said "off," tugging at his shirt. Cas then left a trail of kisses along his chest, never going past his abs. Whatever Dean was going to say before was forgotten. Cas's eyes met his and Dean swore he was looking right into his soul._

_"Dean, you've saved my life so many times, and you dont even know." Cas said. Dean's heart dropped._

_"What are you talking about Cas?" Dean sat up on his elbows. Cas slowly lifted his shirt over his head revealing multiple cuts and bruises. Dean's hand reached out to brush against the freshest looking cut. "Cas," he whispered. Dean's mind filled with hatred. How could Cas's own father do this to him?_

_"Sometimes it hurts so much, dying seems like the better option, but then you stopped me that day, the day I was finally going to end everything. You stopped me and I thought that maybe it was a sign, that I was here for something. That I shouldn't give up on living just yet. Maybe things would get better for me. But they didn't, and they won't. " Cas paused to wipe the tears before they fell._

_"Cas, things will get better, they always do, you-." Cas's hand found its way over deans mouth._

_"But you, dean, you are the reason I keep holding on. You and Sam give me so much hope. That maybe people aren't all that bad. But then I go home, and I remember why-" Dean had let out a choked sob. How could anyone want to die so badly? Dean pulled Cas's face to his, resting their foreheads together._

_"Cas, I love you, I love you so much, and it's breaking my heart hearing you talk like that. Promise me, Cas that you won't do it, no matter what. Because I'll always be here." Cas tilted his head connecting their lips._

_"I love you too,"_

Silent tears ran down Deans face. 

"Our love for you will always stay, if only things didn't end this way. But now you've brought it to the final end, we will always remember you, as a friend," The pastor finished. 

Dean couldnt hold it in any longer. Sobs raked through his body. He loved Castiel will all of his heart. How could he do this, how could he live with out that. Did Cas think Dean didn't need him? Dean will always need him. He needs him now more then ever. 

When Dean found him laying there on the bed, he thought maybe he was sleeping. Deep down he knew, but he reached out anyway shaking Cas's cool body gently. "Cas," he had said. But he knew. He had dropped down to his knees beside the bed, thinking that he should have tried harder, to make Cas happier. But there's only so much you can do to save someone from themselves. Dean knew it wasn't his fault, but it didn't stop him from thinking it. He hadn't cried then. Because he knew. Cas was gone. 

_There is nothing left of you_  
_I can see it in your eyes_  
_Sing the anthem of the angels_  
_And say the last goodbye_  
_I keep holding onto you_  
_But I can't bring you back to life_  
_Sing the anthem of the angels_  
_Then say the last goodbye_


End file.
